A lot of people would like to dance, but do not dare. Not dare ranges from feeling viewed over uncertain and stage fright to real chorophobia or dance phobia. Sometimes that fear is similar to the fear when giving a speech to an audience.
I'm going to be able to?
What will people think of me?
I 'm going to be doing it good (enough) (in their eyes)?
In response, some get completely blocked. They take the step to the dance floor (no longer), or can barely move. And yet they would like dancing (with the other). Sometimes they even find it embarrassing not to dance, and yet they block at each attempt.
Often this is caused by the attention we pay for what others can think about it.
We worry about how we appear.
Actually we need that external focusing on ourselves instead of them. This is not easy for social creatures, but you can learn it. Try to find out what you feel in your own body. Feel what the music and rhythm do with your body. Give your body a chance to respond to that music.
Also, fear and uncertainty are feelings that your body can and should experience and express. Extremely shiver of fear is indistinguishable from shaking. And not moving in a dance is called a freeze. Express what you feel with your body and your movements, and experience how wonderful and liberating it can be. Be interested in what you feel yourself, not what others think. And speak with your body. Dance is expression.
You can practice this by just dancing alone and concentrate on what you feel. Dancing alone at home and move usually works fine. Learn to discover that feeling and focusing on it. Inwardly focused attention you can even practice as you walk on the street.
There are people who do not dare to dance because they are embarrassed about their body. That affects our self-image and self-confidence. But also to our bodies and our condition we can work. Maybe go dancing and just enjoying is a good motivation to go gym or go jogging too.
Other tips: Of course there are also courses and therapies: Mindfulness, Gestalt, Feldenkrais method. That can help ourselves to (learn to) know and accept and use our capabilities as well as possible.
Dance tips: take dance class. It will give you guidance and confidence. You will learn some steps and moves, and then dance those. That is always good. You have a fixed program, and you know that you do it well.
Start with a clear and simple dance, first try - disco boogie. It shoots well, you can see the dance floor quickly and learn how that feels.
There are dance schools witch after about 5 classes have special training evenings for beginners. You are then only with fellow buddies who often find themselves on the dance floor bunglers. That creates a bond and helps you, especially since you took the same classes together. Ask in the dance school for this possibility.
Another approach: go to Argentine tango lesson. Argentine Tango is totally unique as a dance. It is unlike any other dances. You'll learn (to feel the) dance sensation. Go first watching a lesson. Find a tango club that is not giving show dance, but authentic tango. Test whether you can appreciate the music, and can come to rest and try it out.
Be aware of: the best helmsmen stand on shore. Who can explain it with great panache and knows better, therefore isn’t yet. There is a big difference between saying and doing. Do not listen to gossips, watch dancers. It is worth much more to dance 3 minutes yourself than 30 minutes to talk about or listen to. Just do it.
Those who (in your eyes) (seem to) good dancers have also started as a klutz. They have lots and long practiced. As a result, they can. But no one has forgotten that he himself taught and practiced all those steps and moves. Good dancers certainly laugh not with beginners. In the contrary. Plodder is recognized and the efforts (and progress) appreciated. I often see on the dance floor that the best dancers do most stop and try again to get a move right. More, who can, gladly helps you if there is something not (properly) succeeding. Just ask, they feel honored.
Try Zumba. With or without a friend. You'll learn a lot along with other dance moves and rhythms. This way you get enough (self-) confidence to do other different dances.
E.g. line dancing. You can also start without a partner. And you will also learn the steps and rhythms of all standard- and latin dances, only in other moves. It makes the step up again easily.
Try private lessons. Okay, that takes some, but there are no prying eyes. You can quietly and quickly master the basics of some dancing. So it is a good stepping stone to a dance course. You know before you begin there allready that you will be able to. And you know the room and the teacher already.
Ask a (dance) partner that you trust and that gives you confidence, and that makes you dance. Make mistakes, it’s allowed.
Actually there are no mistakes, because there are no fixed rules or laws to dance. Other versions or interpretations always are possible. Someone else has learned a move, they dance differently. That is not wrong, just different.
Try African dance. Go back to primeval rhythms and movements, along with others who also want to explore this from the base in themselves. You cannot do anything wrong. You follow along the same path, and dances. Different, but still... It paves the way for daring to move. No one can make you sound crazy, because everyone does and feels equally strange.
Stand in the disco or dance school in the middle of the hustle and bustle. Hide in the mass. From around the dance floor, you are not visible, and the dancers around you are too busy with themselves.
Go slowing first. You can’t really do anything wrong.
Try it in a dark nightclub.
A commonly used tool: alcohol... I 'm not going to promote it, but you can assess yourselves whether it helps you to take the first steps. You do not have therefore to become a boozer.
You only live once. If you want to, then start! Motivate yourself.
Dress up to go dancing. Creep as in the role of a dancer, and play it.
Another point of view: they do not know me, so what the heck!
In many open houses a dance or a basic step is also taught. Everybody is doing it, to give it a try. Step into the anonymous mass. That makes it nice. And you cannot possibly stand. Maybe it's just that little push that you needed to get started.
Ask a friend to come along. If it makes you feel supported. Or maybe not, if you think you are ashamed.
We've had a couple of times a course disco boogie for the single association. All peers. Dancing is an excellent opportunity to contact, to meet, to meet a potential partner across some pleasant evenings in company with company. Everyone wants to, but very many dare not (properly). They also dare only in their own association. Together.
And it is always fantastic with it. You see guys start with almost no sense of rhythm, awkward. Fumbling and bumbling. Hopeless. And yet, after 5 or 6 lessons you see the same poor guy explain to others the new steps. Amazing isn’t it? And heartwarming. And some get a taste and step with enough given self -confidence to a dance school.
I afterwards heard many stories of how it felt. Longing, but do not daring. Yet only enroll, but actually not dare. And when it comes to short: long nights poorly, or not even sleep... And yet, just drive to the first lesson. Because you have registered. And do not dare to step from the car. Commit yourself to go inside. With red cheeks and a beating heart. Just awful.
But after two lessons already saved! You hear the same stories from others. Even the most macho! (If they at least dare to tell you.) That makes you strong. Just wonderful to see all those people dancing. And enjoy.
And that's the point. So try. If you do not dare, you may have some help of these tips. Pull your courage,...
"The fear of not being able to something is the biggest obstacle to do it." (To Marie Genevieve D' Arconville)